Monday, December 6, 2010

...winter awakening...

My soul is stirring.  Strange that feeling should come at a time that I also associate with darkness.  Today, finally, snowflakes fall.  All at once, winter is here.  

I was beginning to chalk the lack of festive spirit in our household up to exhaustion and isolation.  Sitting (studying...) under the warm orange glow of the kitchen lamp watching the grass get swallowed up by white outside our bay window, I realize that this is what we've been missing.  Feeling cozy inside, sipping tea, candles lit, protected from the wind and snow... the holidays are here.  A prairie girl through and through... need me some of that icy air.  

I should be studying.  It's so hard.  I say this every time, I know... but it really is hard.  I don't want to focus.  I want to pour a glass of red wine and laugh at this crazy life.  I want to walk in the snow with Rob until our cheeks are pink and numb and our kisses warm and connected, remembering each other.  I want to be surrounded with friends and food and drink - feel the sensation of belonging that we were reminded of at the farmhouse in August. 

Tonight we are going for dinner with some friends... I realize now, too late, what bad timing that is.  I will, as usual, make it work for the exam... I just need a 70%.  Doable... I hope.

Then... take THAT Midwifery 4!  Moving on.  Amazing how it all feels like forever... and yet it just keeps going by.

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